


i was at a concert last night (and there you were by my side)

by sammyspreadyourwings



Series: Queen Prompts [72]
Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Queen (Band)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Comfort No Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Touring, Trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:46:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23616202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sammyspreadyourwings/pseuds/sammyspreadyourwings
Summary: Freddie will always be anxious about having to perform. John seems to always be there.
Relationships: Brian May & Roger Taylor, John Deacon/Freddie Mercury
Series: Queen Prompts [72]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1265597
Kudos: 24





	i was at a concert last night (and there you were by my side)

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt fill.

The anxiety hits him at random times, this time it left him curled up next to the couch struggling to breathe.

One would think that as they’ve done this for ten years now, he would be less nervous before a show. It isn’t how it worked, as the crowds got bigger the pressure to perform better increased. His voice has been off, too, as they near the end of the tour. Brian and Roger happily stepping up to help with the notes he can’t quite hit.

Shame, because he knows many of the fans come for his voice and he’s failing in giving it to them, and he can’t imagine what would happen to Queen if he lost his voice permanently.

“Freddie?”

“Here,” he says.

Even though he much rather be alone, if he must be found by anyone he’d prefer it to be Brian, John, or Roger. The fact that he is happier that it is John is his private secret.

John crouches in front of him. A careful distance away, but the toes of their shoes are touching. Freddie looks at John, wearing only some foundation to cover up the exhaustion of the tour.

“How are you?”

Freddie shrugs, “my voice is shot.”

“Completely?” John raises an eyebrow.

“No, I can sing, but Roger is going to have to fill in again.”

John shrugs, “he doesn’t mind.”

“He doesn’t like singing and drumming.”

“He says it is difficult, not that he doesn’t like it.”

Freddie unwinds slightly and holds out a hand. John takes it and rubs soothing circles on the back of it. They sit in silence for several seconds.

“Do you need anything?”

He shakes his head. The tightness in his chest is slowly unwinding. John had missed the worst of it, by design or chance he’s not sure. It's easier though, to calm down when he can breathe.

John shuffles forward, and he spreads his legs. In another time this position would be compromising, but for now, it’s comforting. He could shove John out of his space and the bassist would willingly move away and not raise a sound about how unfair it is.

“We’re on in fifteen,” John says mildly.

It’s more time than he thought, he could probably touch up the make-up around his eyes.

“Sorry.”

John snorts, “don’t be.”

“I should be used to it.”

“I don’t think you can get used to it, Brian isn’t. I’m certainly not.”

“Roger?”

John smiles wryly, “I think he’d be more nervous playing to an empty stadium.”

“Damn human metronome.”

He laughs, “he’ll take it as a compliment.”

The ball of anxiety in his chest is slowly unwinding. John’s long-lasting calm ebbing to his, and the thoughts of his bandmates all having their own crises pre-show gives him a sense of comradery. Maybe that makes him messed up. He is not sure.

John leans forward and kisses him on the forehead, “you’re going to do wonderful. You always do.”

Freddie closes his eyes, “I can’t wait for this tour to be over.”

“You’re telling me. I can’t wait to sleep without having to think about traveling every few hours.”

John shuffles back as Freddie starts to stand up. They hear one of their aides knocking on doors. Yelling about how it’s minutes until showtime. Freddie feels the stage confidence build, but some anxiety is leaking through at the thought of not being able to absorb John’s presence.

When they go out there, he’s going to strutting across the stage while John bounces around. Neither is conducive to a long-lasting serenity. The aide slams his hand on the door three times.

“Five till the show. John, Freddie! Let's go!”

Freddie looks at the door with hesitation. John squeezes his shoulder.

“Come on then, let's go introduce this crowd to her royal majesty.”

Freddie smiles at John who despite his earlier statement does look excited. Freddie is too if he’s honest, but the anxiety is still buzzing around him. John spins around and stops with his hand on his hip and a raised eyebrow.

“Well?”

He walks to where John is standing and takes in a deep breath. John leans slightly and places a quick kiss on his cheek. Freddie grins back.

Somewhere in the distance, he hears the three-minute call. John squeezes his wrist with a careful smile.

“Well, let’s make them fall in love for a night, dear.”

John stands aside and lets Freddie pass him. As he exits the dressing room, he thinks he hears John mumble something.

It sounds as though he said, “they’re the lucky ones.”

Then again, it could be wishful thinking on his behalf. John loving him is up there with some of Brian’s astronomical figures ( _“It’s unlikely that we’ll be hit by a meteor.” “Only unlikely? Comforting.” “It is!”)._ Freddie lives and loves everything with his entire heart, John wants a quiet all-consuming sort of love.

He might feel less protective of John than when he joined, but the urge is still there. Will likely always be there.

“Freddie! Come on!” Roger calls from further up the hallway, “preferably before the crowd dies of boredom!”

He is running his hand up and down Brian’s back who’s looking less excited than anyone in the history of the world. John catches up to him and steals another quick peck on the cheek.

“Cheer up, Brian, dove,” Freddie says, “just let the Old Lady do her thing.”

Brian nods shakily.

“Hey John, maybe you should kiss Brian! It helped me,” he teases.

Both John and Brian share a look and then share exaggerated gagging noises. Roger cackles, but Brian looks more relaxed and John still as eager.

Maybe he will work up the confidence to tell John how he feels at the next concert, or perhaps the one after that. Then again, he’s been saying that since 1974.

**Author's Note:**

> As always, leave your thoughts and comments below or come talk to me on Tumblr!


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